The Grand Illusion
The other morning at breakfast, I happened to read, actually read, the “guarantee” on the side of the waxed cardboard container containing cream, which promised that my satisfaction would be guaranteed or I’d either get my money back or a new container of cream, whichever I desired. All I had to do was to send the empty container back to the company.
Except the cream cost $4.95, and the empty container weighed about four ounces. So to mail a five ounce package back to the company, according to the U.S. Postal Service calculator, would cost $2.72. Since I don’t have a postage meter, and the only stamps I have are first class forever stamps, I’d either have to go to the nearest post office, roughly two miles away, or use four stamps (totalling $3.12 in value). So… if the cream had been spoiled, I’d end up paying $4.95 for the cream originally, then spending either $3.12 or $2.72 (with additional driving costs and time), to recover the $4.95. I’m not desperate enough to spend all that time to recover a little more than two dollars, and I suspect someone who’s really poor, assuming they’d even consider purchasing a large container of cream, wouldn’t have the time or possibly the resources, either.
So, for practical purposes, the “guarantee” is almost meaningless, at least to me.
But how many products have a similar guarantee — your satisfaction guaranteed or your money or a replacement back?
The Federal Trade Commission has a whole set of regulations dealing with guarantees, and they’re fairly detailed, and I suspect they’re moderately effective for larger items from reputable sellers, but even if the seller abides by the regulations, in the case of small items, the buyer may not want to go thorough the hassles of trying to obtain the guarantee.
In the case of the cream, there’s almost no downside to the producer making the guarantee, because the guarantee boosts the company with a minimal downside.
It is the bad actors though that require this kind of thing. As they say, “This is why we can’t have nice things.” There are too many people who would say they weren’t satisfied to get a free cartoon of cream.
Everyone has to pay the price of the bad actors. I don’t know the solution. It is hard to clamp down on bad actors for minor things without becoming worse.
As you said, essentially free publicity and good PR.
That said, if you have spoiled cream you can just get a refund at the store you bought it from, who has certainly made an allowance for spoilage and loss or has a deal in place to return the product.
Ultimately it’s a case of makign sure the little person is made whole and multiple levels of that aren’t a bad thing even if they’re not as good as they seem.
For perishable products, it would make sense if one could return them to the store for refund or replacement, with further resolution being between the store and the manufacturer.